Bella Syk

Thinking bout forever

Well my life wasn’t planned out much past getting to the On The Run tour.Ive fell off in the past month. Stats at work shit, haven’t been working out (as much) AND Im drinking pop again.
I need a goal. Thinkin bout a birthday one. I want to see what under 200 lbs looks like. I havent seen that since high school!
Maybe a savings because im terrible at that shit. Ill be one if those people working at 90, lol Id never let this go on that long. This is really hard for me.
You could say both but I’m barely gonna reach one, so let’s be realistic. Im trying, daily. I break down the hours in the day. Im not fully relaxing, even with weed. Im bracing because this is when things go bad.
Too many things have been in my favor for this to go on to long. So instead of moving, Im braced, ready to take it. I know, Im trying.
Im lonely sometimes but I fill my spaces by walking the city. I see new things, Im not sitting down. Being very me obviously.

— 3 days ago with 1 note
#berrys thoughts  #the catch up 
So so many feels!

I think everyday “Update you tumblr! No one cares but at least you can you look back see the days really do pass” So here I am finally doing it. Its been a month since I saw King B in Houston. It was a weekend filled with fun an relaxation. Well as much I relax nowadays. 

I didnt know I was going until Thursday an left Friday morning. I had to call into work two days in a row. For a new job I shouldve been more nervous but they continually fuck with me ( another blog, another day) so I didnt feel to bad about it I arrived Friday an took a van to my hotel. I was hella nervous about the hotel because I now use a amex prepaid card an I have no idea where it is excepted. Every time I think everywhere, sometimes says nawwww.lol. 

I met up with a friend I knew only from twitter, I do this a lot. We had drinks before the concert. Ended up walking to the concert with a papercup filled with liquor. Felt so freeing to walk down the street with a drink, in Houston on vacation. I sat by myself for the concert but I soaked in everything. I stood the entire time because I mean King didnt work that hard for me to be sitting down. I learned I know a lot of Jigga songs, the lyrics not just beats WHAT? I have a memory? Only for things Ill never need. 

After the concert I went back to my hotel an chilled. I was waiting for the walls to fall in. Things dont happen for me like that without horrible things attached..There are no just happys days round these parts. Well they didnt fall in lol. I went to breakfast the next day with a friend Mo who was a previous twitter friend but now I just say friend. I ended up being late for my flight an my friend Mo offered me her couch THANK YOU! 

I thought that would be more stressful but It wasnt! She took me for togo daq’s & whataburger like what more could I ask for? The next day I made my flight. Overalll my weekend was hella relaxing. I got a WIN! Its been so long without one I wasnt sure they were for me anymore. Thanks to Val,Mo & E for all being apart of making my weekend wonderful. 

— 4 days ago
#otr houston  #a win was needed  #berrys thoughts 
Here I am

Trying to get to Houston for this B+J tour stop. Its been my only real goal all year. Its looked iffy since I bought the ticket! An I still owe a friend for helping me with it. I just wanna see this!
Its 12:54 am and my clothes are in the dryer. Im going over the money thing an I think I need to pick cheaper hotel. Calling into my new job, to go. Idk idk idk…
I just want to have a WIN! I want to see this concert and come home the next day.

Berry

— 1 month ago
OKKK

So now five people from my old call center jobs + one friends ex + one cousins baby daddy. Call centers really do just trade people around! Omg what if this is the rest of my life?!?!?!? But one good thing, a chick I use to blow HARD with works here. So one good thing? (lol)

— 1 month ago

People are doing this thing where they feel like telling my mom something is the same as me an its making me feel some kind of way

— 1 month ago

I always put people as older/above me. This is my worst habit by far! I just auto put people above me, as having it together, as being better. *sigh*
Lost $100 earphones from work in an hour an I have no idea where *sigh*
Im starting to feel like im always going to be poor an like the hardest thing im dealing with my life. To be poor an barely making it. I cant keep living like this.

Bella B

— 1 month ago

Just told a coworker about #TheRead and she told me about the Tom Joyner show…TOM JOYNER IS NOT NEW 😒 She also loves Bossip & BGC. This new job is a gem. Starting a blog for my call centers stories now!

— 1 month ago
Sunny days

I wonder if she’s on her way to my job. Naw she’s dressed to nice and looks happy.
He looks nice. He could be going to my job, dressing for the job he wants! Then Id have to start dressing up, thats not gonna last. Oh, well bye then.
Still in route…late

— 1 month ago
Break post

•Walked into work and a girl was curling her hair in the bathroom.
•Funny guy #2 made a dumb Solo elevator joke
•Basically this was a week of training/interview because they havent gave out badges and they are doing sample calls with feedback & a final tomorrow.
•There’s a baby momma/baby daddy situation happening in the parking lot as I type. The baby mama didnt come last night. Cursing the mom right in front of the kids. She’s at work and he made her come out to ask her shit! This is wild! They not together but she was suppose to pick up the kids but got caught up with Sara-jo, had a beer and well…He threatened to fuck her up in the parking lot. Kids just around them. She on drugs an is use to defusing situations. He was asking her about last night and she replied “You leave the windows open? HIM: Why? Her: cause the mosiquitos mustve got your neck! I mean already? HIM: We aint been together in four months! Her: My break is over. He packed up the kids an left.
End if break byeeeeee

— 1 month ago
Cc

How is there not a tv show on call centers?!? Not that crap that was on cbs/nbc/abc like a orange is the new black type show?!? This is a goldmine. Im not fitting in so far :-/ i need to peep up or im not gonna make it. Being dead inside is so hard some days.

— 1 month ago